The January Diet Resolution

T’was the month after Christmas and all through the house,

Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse,

The cookies I’d nibbled, the eggnog I’d taste,

At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.

When I got on the scales, there arose such a number!

When I walked to the store (less a walk than a lumber),

I’d remember the marvelous meals I’d prepared,

The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared.

The wine and the rum balls; the bread and the cheese,

And the way I’d never said, “No thank you, please.”

As I dressed myself in my husband’s old shirt,

And prepared once again to battle with dirt,

I said to myself, as only I can

“You can’t spend a winter disguised as a man!”

So, away with the last of the sour cream dip.

Get rid of the fruitcake, every cracker and chip.

Every last bit of food that I like must be banished,

‘Til all the additional ounces have vanished.

I won’t have a cookie – not even a lick.

I’ll only just chew on a long celery stick.

I won’t have hot biscuits, or cornbread, or pie,

I’ll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.

I’m hungry, I’m grouchy, can’t fit through the door,

But isn’t that what January is for?

Unable to giggle, no longer a riot.

Happy New Year to all and to all a good diet! ~ Author Unknown

My New Year’s Resolution over the Years:

2009: I will get my weight down below 180 pounds.

2010: I will follow my new diet religiously until I get below 200 pounds.

2011: I will develop a realistic attitude about my weight.

2012: I will work out three days a week.

2013: I will try to drive past a gym at least once a week.

2014: I will stay fit and healthy even if it kills me.

2015: I will lose weight by starting a diet and sticking to it… Is that cake?

2016: I will stick to my New Year’s resolution for more than one week.

2017: I will stop making New Year’s resolutions.

What is your New Year’s Resolution?

 

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HC Estate Calendar January 2018

HC Estate Newsletter January 2018